We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Don't Be Surprised When You See Us Bears

by The Bicycats

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $9 USD  or more

     

  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Flat, handy "record sleeve for CDs" jacket featuring artwork by Jim Pierce.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Don't Be Surprised When You See Us Bears via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 5 days

      $10 USD or more 

     

1.
I've got a fierce competition for the flying squirrel He's not the only brother out there with wingspan I've got a fierce competition for the flying squirrel 'Cause I can do what all those mothers with wings can I know it isn't natural No, I would never make that call You can always travel far and wide but you can't always travel tall I've got a fierce competition for the flying squirrel And he thinks that he's so goddamned clever I've got fierce competition for the flying squirrel But I've got the greatest idea ever I'll make the seagulls do a double take When they see me within their reach As the girls in their bikinis go Busalooey on the beach: "Look at that guy over there He needs new shoes but he's in the air He's next to that bird, and he's got brown hair And I want his number Look at that fella in the sky He seems like an otherwise normal guy Down here he's no bigger than a french fry But I want his number" I've got a fierce competition for the flying squirrel And he's jealous of the goggles I'm wearing I've got fierce competition for the flying squirrel And I can see the people stopping and staring I'll make the pigeons do a double take When they see me flying through downtown Past the bankers drooling on their business suits As I'm hovering near a cloud: "Look at that guy with his outstretched limbs Our financial fortunes are looking grim But we can make our millions off of him That's why I want his number We'll buy his patent for a buck or two Then market overseas with our investment group We'll lap it up in our swimming pools That's why I want his number" I've got a fierce competition for the flying squirrel Yeah he thinks that he's so goddamned clever I've got fierce competition for the flying squirrel But you know that nothing lasts forever Cause sometimes there's a thunderstorm And it's not always a windy day Like the railroad baron or the automat Some things will fade away But I can drop my competition with the flying squirrel Biologically, it's only right I can drop my competition with the flying squirrel If I could spend some time with you tonight You might think I'm a sucker Getting grounded on the street I know I won't be flying but You still lift me off my feet I've got fierce competition for the flying squirrel He's not the only brother out there with wingspan
2.
Mimblegast is bigger than a life-sized statue of a man who's six feet tall Mimblegast, if you give him a chance, you might not regret it at all Mimblegast is a fire on a winter's day He doesn't want trouble, it just happens that way Mimblegast, his heart is the size of a whale that's bigger than the other whales He knows the difference 'tween wrong and right, his conscience is a compass that never fails Mimblegast is kinda crafty for a castaway He doesn't want trouble, it just happens that way Nobody pins down Mimblegast Cause he buries secrets from the past And you never know if he's gonna last You gotta keep it going, gotta keep it going, gotta keep it going (2x) Mimblegast is bigger than a life-sized statue of man who made the grade Mimblegast, he plays a song to make you dance along the promenade Mimblegast has a questionable resume He doesn't want trouble, it just happens that way
3.
Eye On You 02:57
I don't need a stunning vista I don't need a lovely view I don't need a picture scene from a flowery summer dream Cause I've got my eye on you I don't need a space between H and J I don't need the extra room You make it easy so I don't need a socket in my skull Cause I've got my eye on you I gotta, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta Remember to hold tight If I'm feeling jittery when you're within my sight I hafta, I hafta, I hafta, I hafta Remember to keep sane By gluing up my eyelids and put a bag over my face I feel like a bud in the springtime I feel like a mad kangaroo I feel like a stick of butter melting in the microwave When I've got my eye on... I've got my eye on... When I've got my eye on you
4.
Well you would never know what a good boy he is No you would never think he's what you're looking for All of his male friends say that he is worth your time But your instinct says that he should be ignored But if you're wondering whether he'd make a good lover (la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-ooh) The opinions of a female will get you covered You need a girl-on-girl recommendation You can trust a girl and her explanation Cause a girl-on-girl recommendation Will tell you if he's all right. It doesn't seem like you would want a boy like him Cause he wears ugly shoes and he has saggy eyes He drives a pick-up truck, that can't bode well for him But if you ask the girls, they'll tell you otherwise They'll say he's dynamite, and that he's charming, too He'll get you flowers and he'll make your birthday cake He'll take you for a ride, a place you've never been You'll want to drive all night and never hit the brakes But if you're wondering whether he'd make a good lover (la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-ooh) The opinions of a female will get you covered You need a girl-on-girl recommendation You can trust a girl and her explanation Cause a girl-on-girl recommendation Will tell you if he's all right. Girls are never wrong no no no no no Girls are always right, yeah, yeah Girls will always know know know know know know If he'll be all right.
5.
I never met the queen of Spain I never got to see her crown But I'm acquainted with the foremost kisser Of this here town Can't cross Atlantis off my list I never went before it drowned But I'm acquainted with the foremost kisser Of this here town I'm always looking for adventure In a most unlikely place But I never waste my time I'll be dreaming about tomorrow I'll never be an adjective But I'll always be a noun A noun who's acquainted with the foremost kisser Of this here town Suppose you blast me through the ozone On a trip to outer space Can we let the records show It's not my preferred excursion I never saw the Beatles play I've only heard recorded sounds But I'm acquainted with the foremost kisser Of this here town
6.
Marine Layer 03:51
I'm gonna tell the world about my marine layer I see no reason why I'd keep it to myself I'll tell them where to go If they don't already know Anchors away, and here's to our health This song goes out to the ones who think I'm not a team player It's foggy and pristine and waiting just for you It's a twenty-minute drive And you'll see when you arrive It was worth all the hullabaloo I would never change a thing about my marine layer And I think we'd all agree it's fine the way it is, oh yeah Now, if I can get your vote, I'm gonna be a green mayor So wear the proper shoes and bring a hoodie too It's not exactly rain You'll never be the same I'm gonna tell the world about my marine layer
7.
I called my lover by a term he found endearing And he told me I should call him that again Overzealous me tried thinking of new nicknames But he said, "Stop--we're good for now." He said he'd hate if I got creative But I went ahead and tried it anyhow I wanna give him a handle that'll really cling A nom de plume or a moniker that's fit for a king But every time I try, he tells me, "Here's the thing," He says, "Sweet Potato will do." I wanna call him Buster and I wanna call him Babe Address him with affection before the whole entire neighb But so says the man I give my kisses to He says, "Sweet Potato will do." I try to call him my cookiecake or my gumdrop melonball Or my powdered sugar ice cream candy bar But my man prefers the savory with the sweet I guess it wasn't in the stars (no, it wasn't) I give him a back rub and another glass of wine I give him a smile and a piece of my mind But like a little goober, he prefers to be a tuber He says, "Sweet Potato will do." Some say he's being stubborn, and others, resolute But I think that it goes deeper you see He doesn't want confusion enveloping the air 'Cause he's only Sweet Potato to me (that's the story) So after he walks inside and just before he hangs his hat I'd like to call him Muffin Boy, or something dumb like that But there's no need to doubt it, I won't make a fuss about it 'Cause he's a Sweet Potato through and through Yeah, I think Sweet Potato -- will have to do do-do-do...
8.
America, land of hopes and dreams Also Krispy Kremes My home, America It goes from Florida to Alaska In the middle there's Nebraska And there are forty-seven other states as well A patriotic pride of lions Bonded by a bold alliance If you cross us then we're gonna give you hell America, big and tall and wide Roller coaster rides My home, America Bald eagles soar across the skyline And it's written in our byline You can get married in Utah even if you're gay Freedom sounds off through the brass holes Where you're free to be an asshole But we'd much prefer you didn't act that way (In) America, we played baseball as We invented jazz My home, America We put the first man on the moon We put the second man on the moon We put twelve men total on the moon (so far) No other countries can ignore us Those and ones that came before us May never get the grit we've got today These stars and stripes fly high and free America, we're here to stay
9.
We were camping one night in the neighbor's backyard Testing how we would do, but it wasn't that hard We sat up in a tent, but didn't know what to do So we went back inside to watch a movie or two Well the picture was good, but the sound wasn't on So if it's okay with you, we might be happier gone We might be happier working out a life on our own Without you You We shit in the woods We're furry and brown We like to exist When you're not around Well we never believed that we were meant for this world So we dropped out of town and we gave it a whirl You always complained we can't take care of ourselves But look at us now, we're unlike anyone else We catch the salmon upstream from the river nearby Stuff them into a crust and bake them into a pie If I say so myself, this will never get old And we love it, love it We shit in the woods We're furry and brown We like to exist When you're not around But sometimes we're scared Because we're surprised But don't be surprised When you see us bears, bears, bears There's a lot to be learned from all the work that we've done It took a lot of our time but it was plenty of fun If we do this again and I think that we will There'll be less time to be cute and more salmon to kill Now the secret I feel to being free thinking bears Is ignoring your comforts and forgetting your cares It takes a boatload of moxie and a thimble of spunk To be grizzly, grizzly We shit in the woods We're furry and brown We like to exist When you're not around But sometimes we're scared Because we're surprised But don't be surprised When you see us bears, bears, bears We shit in the woods We shit in the woods We shit in the woods
10.
I got on the wrong plane I'm in Fairbanks, Alaska It's negative fifty And I don't have my jacket But my jacket won't do me any good here Cause it's negative fifty I'm in Fairbanks, Alaska
11.
My situation had been dire Since the day that I got fired I've been sleeping in my '88 sedan So I called on two good buddies Who were feeling just as nutty And told them all the details of my plan "The paintings hung in the museum We'll pretend we came to see 'em We'll stuff them in a sack and then we'll move And then we'll put out feelers To some crooked, wealthy dealers We'll be stealing paintings from the Louvre "Now I don't want to harass Those security guards in Paris By putting tranquilizers in their croissants I'm not doing it for pleasure I'm not doing it for leisure I'm doing it so I can finally have a chance We'll take the things we've stolen Hop a boat and keep on rollin' To somewhere in Canada like Toronto or the 'Couv Maybe we'll make some money Off some Manets or some Monets We'll be stealing paintings from the Louvre" We'll I knew that Mona Lisa Would wanna get a piece of All the action so I let her come along To share the lovely oeuvre Of the city of Vancouver Where the friendly folk think I've done nothing wrong Before my life was bumpy And my clothes were looking frumpy But I think I've gotten back into the groove I've learned the payoff of my hard work After looting precious artwork Because I stole some paintings from the Louvre Because I stole some paintings from the Louvre

about

This is technically the third album by The Bicycats, but one could make the argument that this is the fourth or the eighth.

credits

released April 6, 2018

The Bicycats:
Zachary Bernstein - singing, guitar, bass guitar, drums, keyboards

Also featuring the talents of:
Sabrina Lloyd - singing and talking (tr. 4)
Cj Merriman - singing and talking (tr. 4)
Shannon Nelson - singing and talking (tr. 4)
Kat Primeau - singing and talking (tr. 4)
Chris Schell - flugelhorn (tr. 3)
Korey Simeone - fiddle (tr. 11)
Ellen Warkentine - singing (tr. 7)
PJ Wyderka - upright bass (tr. 3, 5, 7, 11)

Zachary Bernstein wrote, performed, and produced each song.
Recorded in Los Angeles, California.
Album artwork and design by Jim Pierce.
Mastered at G&J Audio.
Thank you to DeAnne Millais, Jim Pierce, and Eric Radoux.

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

The Bicycats Los Angeles, California

Zachary Bernstein is The Bicycats. A folk-rock troubadour with charm, melody, and humor.

contact / help

Contact The Bicycats

Streaming and
Download help

Report this album or account

If you like The Bicycats, you may also like: